How do you know if God is speaking to you?

I always say in messages that you should listen to God and do what He says, regardless of if it fits with what you think is in your path, He should be the one who directs your steps.

Someone asked me yesterday "How do I know if what I'm hearing is God speaking to me or if it's just my own idea that I want to do?"  While I can't speak directly to everything that God says to you or anyone, I can give you some guidelines to test whether God is directing you are not.

1)  You need to have a relationship with Christ.  This is crucial.  It means that you've accepted that you've been at odds with God and that can be as simple as not doing exactly what He wants from you (we've all been there) at some time in your life.  Realizing that Romans 6:23 says that the wages or price of that sin is death or separation from God.  God sent Jesus, His son, to live on Earth as a human and Jesus lived as no one has ever done before or since...He never did anything that God did not want from Him, He never sinned.  Then he was killed for our sin, so that justice in Romans 6:23 could be satisfied, but we could have a way not to be eternally separated from Him.  The way we accept this is to confess with our mouth that Jesus is our Lord (in other ways, we do what He says to do and live our lives for His purposes not our own) and believe in our heart (total belief) that He was God's Son.  That's the first thing.

2)  Begin to read God's Word daily and spend time praying (talking) with Him...and listening.  Jesus said in John 10:23 that the people who follow Him know His voice.  So, as we follow HIm, His voice is more evident...it's cumulative.  Also, He will never tell you to do something against His Word.  He'll never say "Hey, your wife is mean..leave her, you've put up with enough."  Or  "Your husband is an inconsiderate loser...leave him, that'll show him."  That's contrary with the Bible's clear teaching on marriage, so better check that..  As you spend time with God following Him, you'll get to know him more and more.  Also, during each day, I look for other ways for God to communicate or shape the direction that He wants me to go and it's amazing how things begin to line up.

3)  Plug into a Bible teaching church that you can trust.   You should be able to trust that the leadership seek God personally...that people in the church do the same.  It should be a place where you connect with people and that's on you to try as well, not just on them to do all the work of relationship.  Then you develop relationships with people who you know are following God and have your best interests at heart.  Proverbs tells us that "as iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another"...we are meant to learn in groups, sharing what we learn and building on it.  Many times, I've sought others' viewpoints on what God is telling me and they've affirmed it or what's going on with them/what God is teaching them has helped shape the direction.  It's giving God more avenues to speak to you.

If it's a life-altering decision, like a career change or a location change or something big, like say God was telling me to quit my job and start a ministry to help the homeless, I might meet with someone from "His Place Ministries" or from "Our Daily Bread" (ministries in Melbourne/Palm Bay area) and see how God inspired them to start these ministries and look for affirmation or shaping in those discussions.

Relationship with Christ -- testing what is said against God's Word and listening to Him -- looking for signs and messages around you -- plugging into a community of believers who give God more opportunities to speak to you...all these things are great for you.  If you are married, your spouse will be a big player in this, because nothing you do is separate from them...so they have to be in with you to a degree.  It might be in the "okay, we'll try that" or in the "alright!!! I'm in!!!" mode.  God has directed the timing of moves in my life by the way He's spoken to my wife or the time that He's taken to speak to her and vice versa, her with me.

Hope that helps you to know if God is speaking to you on a certain issue.

I hope this helps...

Sugar and air

Every year, we make our way around to that time when we all are bombarded with signs of love everywhere. Hearts, flowers and balloons mark the stores, advertisements and commercials on TV. Usually our mental paintings of love consist of romantic fancy and that's certainly a part of the equation. Still, for me, I see this extreme over-emphasis on this small part of love, as more of a detriment in some ways than a help. Don't lynch me...hear me out.

I fear that in focusing exclusively on the emotional part of love in our relationships, we walk away with the wrong definition of what we sign up for. Love is not about that rush of feeling you get, that's not the substance of love, that's like the icing on a cake. Icing on a cake is pretty much sugar and air. In every relationship, there comes a time, where the strength of love is tested. If your version of "love" is just sugar and air, then you are in trouble, because there no substance to it. Icing never stands by itself, it needs a solid substance by which to cling.

The substance of real love is based in commitment and sacrifice. The Bible says that there's no greater love that a man can have than to lay down his life for his friends. The most extreme picture of this definition was when God's Son, Jesus, gave His life for every one of us without a "pre-nuptial" promise beforehand. That's unconditional...freely given regardless of whether it's returned or not.

Everyone longs to be loved in this manner because it's real. The problem is that we all want it, but we don't want to do the work to give it. It's the son that wants his mom to just "accept him", but doesn't embrace her lack of acceptance. It's the wife, that thinks its all her husband's fault, and if he'd just "love" her like he is supposed to, then everything would be fine or the husband who does the same...we all want to have the perfect partner to love, but much like Jesus, who has no choice but imperfection from which to choose to love, it isn't happening. That's part of what Jesus modeled for us, because the strength of love is never in the getting, but in the giving of it. Here's another truth of it...if you aren't willing to give it, you will never get it, it will never come to you by demanding it. You'll just be shouting at the rain. It's a commitment freely given, with risk of it never returning anything. That's hard, but true.

So when you "get" the flowers or the golf clubs or the card, and over a candlelight dinner you gaze into the eyes of someone, don't forget that the feeling of the moment has to have some hard choosing, unglamorous, pride-swallowing sacrifice at its foundation if it's going to last. If not, it'll wash away at some point, either in light rain or hurricane, because ultimately, it was just sugar and air to begin with.